Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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