Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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