you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
