pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
