i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
