Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize