i was born a porn star she said
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
