I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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