The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I think i got beer on your cat.
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