Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
