he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
it glows. i had to have it.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
we should paint friendship bongs
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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