He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
