what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
