Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
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Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
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She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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