I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
