Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize