Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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