bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
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He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
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That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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