He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
