I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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