yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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