Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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