I'm going to jail i love you
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Randomize
