i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
