That's when you crack a 10am beer
farters have to be the big spoon...
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
