I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
