One girl and one boy is just not enough.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
