Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize