It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
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Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
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THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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