he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
