Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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