Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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