You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Randomize
