Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
