I got chris browned last night
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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