Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
