so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize