tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
