Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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