Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize