come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Randomize