I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
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