ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
