I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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