I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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