we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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