1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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