It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
