? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Drunk is a universal language darling
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