I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Dicks are not precious.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
